AC #05: Overthinking.

Give yourself a break, okay?

Ah, the joys of being an over-thinker! I'm guilty as charged: constantly mulling over every possible scenario, concocting elaborate combinations of edge cases, and expending precious energy fretting about scenarios that have about as much chance of happening as winning the lottery twice in a row. And then, like a mad scientist mixing potions, I blend them all together, envisioning every potential outcome, every conceivable way I might inadvertently deceive those around me, and how my entire career could spontaneously combust into oblivion. 💥 Voilà! Success, right? Wrong. Instead, my brain ends up resembling a mushy paste of anxiety, fried to a crisp.

I trace this tendency back to my childhood, where I held the title of "Shyest Kid in the Room" (well, let's just say I haven't exactly outgrown that title completely). Add to that being the eldest child of divorced parents who always balanced everyone out, and the relentless pressure to be a top-notch student, and you've got a recipe for a lifetime subscription to the Over-Thinkers Anonymous club. Now, fast forward two decades, and I can clearly see how these childhood influences continue to shape both my professional career and personal life.

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Tales of overthinking 🍳

Alright, let's dive into the chaotic world of overthinking. Brace yourself, because this ride might get a bit bumpy. 🎢

To be frank, things have been worse for me in the past - I'll give you that much. But hey, I've been navigating through the madness (remember that commitment?), and there are definitely brighter days amidst the storm. I've been on a journey of self-discovery, learning what sets off my anxiety, which scenarios tend to send me spiraling into overdrive, and mastering the art of letting go. Spoiler alert: it's far from a perfect process.

Growing up and evolving in today's world hasn't exactly been a cakewalk. Our society keeps throwing curveballs at us - wars, global pandemics, financial struggles, companies going bananas 🍌 - and just the act of adulting itself can feel like an Olympic-level challenge. Yet, as a proud millennial, I have the luxury of accessing a wealth of information at lightning speed, something my ancestors could only dream of. Of course, they had their own battles to fight—fascism, world wars, mass migrations—but it begs the question: Is it worse to be blissfully ignorant or painfully aware of the world around us? Food for thought, right?

Now, let's talk about the big bad wolf lurking in the shadows: perfectionism. It's a beast I've grappled with for years, stressing over the tiniest details and struggling to let loose. Blame it on the whole A-grade upbringing thing or those lovely workplace environments where I was expected to anticipate every possible hiccup before making a move.

And don't even get me started on the laundry list of other possible triggers:

• Actual anxiety disorders (better cross that off your list!)

• Stress (the eternal nemesis)

• Fear of crashing and burning (a classic)

• Confidence levels that resemble a rollercoaster ride

• Traumatic experiences (e.g. car accidents, break-ups, unexpectedly losing a loved one)

But here's the kicker: overthinking is a vicious cycle. You get caught in this endless loop of obsessing over problems and potential outcomes, sending your anxiety levels through the roof. And guess what? That anxiety only feeds the overthinking monster, making it grow stronger with each passing thought. It's like a twisted game of mental tug-of-war, and trust me, I know your heart rate is already skyrocketing just thinking about it. 😵‍💫

So buckle up, my friend. I said it was bumpy, remember?

Reflecting is not overthinking. Overthinking is not reflecting.

Your way out of it 🥚

Let's clear the fog around overthinking, shall we? It's crucial to distinguish it from healthy reflection - taking a peek into the past or preparing for the future can lead to valuable insights and personal growth. Overthinking, on the flip side, tends to be a dead-end street.

But fear not! There's always a way out of the overthinking labyrinth.

• Spot the recurring patterns. If you've felt that familiar pang of anxiety before, chances are you're trapped in a similar scenario. Whether it's the fear of public speaking, navigating social interactions, or battling FOMO, overthinking comes in various flavors, each tailored to hijack your peace of mind. Recognizing these patterns is key. 🍧

• Take the reins of your emotions and thoughts. Don't let them run wild; give them a name and dive deeper into the root cause of your overthinking. Journaling isn't just for documenting your day - it's a powerful tool for uncovering anxiety triggers and gaining clarity on your emotions, whether it's anger, stress, or joy.

• Embrace mindfulness. By grounding yourself in the present moment and accepting your thoughts and feelings without judgment, you can reclaim your mental clarity and push back against anxiety's relentless grip. And remember, a rested mind is a resilient mind, so prioritize self-care, exercise, and quality sleep to bolster your mental well-being.

• Put things into perspective. Anxiety has a sneaky way of blowing problems out of proportion, but oftentimes, they're not as insurmountable as they seem. Challenge the exaggerated narrative in your head and remind yourself of past victories. Example: I’m no marathonist, but I really like running and the accomplishment feeling I get when I end a race. The way you approach your success here can go a lot of ways, depending on your expectations: a) run for the first place, b) exceed your best personal mile, c) you’re doing it for the fun of it, d) you had no clue what you were committing to. The latter one can be anxiety-inducing: yes, you won’t finish first place, you have never run this but at the same time, you managed to do something less than 10% of the world does. Why feel anxious about it? Choose proud instead.

• Trade worst with the best. Next time you're on the brink of overthinking, shift your focus to the potential positives. It's a subtle yet powerful shift in perspective that can break the cycle of negative thinking and propel you towards action. The next time around, why not give it a go:

What’s the worst best thing that can happen?

Ah, the age-old adage: practice makes perfect. When it comes to tackling anxiety triggers, it's like hitting the gym - you've got to work those mental muscles every day to build resilience and master the art of dealing with them. The more you flex those coping mechanisms, the better equipped you'll be to face them head-on and even anticipate their next appearance.

As time marches on, you'll start to figure out what puts you in your flow state, what brings you peace, and what truly rejuvenates your spirit. It's all about finding that delicate balance and leaning into what works best for you.

Oh, and a friendly reminder from yours truly: get out of your head every once in a while. It's easy to get lost in the labyrinth of your thoughts, but sometimes, the best solutions are found outside the confines of your mind.

So take a breather, step outside, and soak in the beauty of the world around you. Your mental health will thank you for it. 🌿